Silence Is Still Strength

ErinMedication13 Comments

When we are silent, we are still strong. Even when we feel like a cup not even half-empty, but tipped over, spilled across the floor, kicked, stepped on, cracked and forever broken, we’re still strong. You have a track record of making it through every single day up to today. No matter what choices you made, what mistakes happened, what … Read More

ErinSilence Is Still Strength

Antidepressant Withdrawal Hell

ErinMedication32 Comments

I feel terrible. I have what feels like the flu: nausea, muscle aches, nerve pain, tremors, hot and cold flashes, weakness, and lethargy. It’s lasted all month. The cause? I cut down my antidepressant by a measly 3mg. I don’t normally name my antidepressants on this blog, because meds affect everyone differently, but I’m naming this culprit: Cymbalta. I’ve been … Read More

ErinAntidepressant Withdrawal Hell

Do I Deserve to Feel Better?

ErinMedication4 Comments

This morning I talked with my psychiatrist about whether I deserve to feel better. We were talking about increasing my one antidepressant, and the idea of changing my mood, even for the better, scares me a little. Change is scary! Obviously, my psychiatrist feels that I deserve to feel better. But my mental health is in my hands more than … Read More

ErinDo I Deserve to Feel Better?

Mondays: Music, Memories & Medication

ErinMedication, medication, Monday Theme3 Comments

Along with music and memories, I’ve chosen the third “M” word for Monday’s themed posts to be medication. It’s the largest reason I am still alive today, still breathing, and functioning enough to write here. I have to spend a chunk of this week making sure I have enough medication to take with me on my upcoming travels. My psychiatrist … Read More

ErinMondays: Music, Memories & Medication

The Brave New World of Medication

ErinMedication, The Mental Health System2 Comments

I’m not going to lie: I’m swamped in getting ready for my craft show this weekend and have not written a new post. While I hope to be a Speedy Gonzales-esque writer one of these days and write ten posts ahead of schedule, it hasn’t happened yet. Don’t be disappointed, however! Tonight you get to step into the shoes of … Read More

ErinThe Brave New World of Medication

Meds, Part Two: Bad Emotional Reactions

ErinMedication, Symptoms and Side-Effects1 Comment

It was basically my worst nightmare to become suicidal from medication because after all, I was taking it to feel better, not worse. Thankfully, I didn’t have any really bad emotional effects from medication until I was well into treatment and could recognize when I was going downhill. Otherwise, it could have been fatal. As I write this I question … Read More

ErinMeds, Part Two: Bad Emotional Reactions

Meds, Part One: An Overview

ErinMedication, Symptoms and Side-Effects2 Comments

I am a walking cocktail of medication and have been since I was diagnosed with depression. One by one pills have been added and subtracted to balance out my brain, some making me physically sick, some making me sleepy, some making me suicidal. Why put myself though all that? I do it because the alternative is worse. After years and … Read More

ErinMeds, Part One: An Overview