The Art of Living With a Depression Blog

ErinBlog Maintenance16 Comments

00migrainegirl1I need to update with what’s going on in my head even though I have no idea what to do with it all.

Ever since my videos with HealthiNation won an Emmy, the traffic to my blog has skyrocketed. It’s wonderful but man, I never intended for things to get this big! When this was just one blog out of kajillions, I felt more freedom and anonymity. And now everyone knows me as “that girl with depression.”

When I started writing here, I chose to blog about two things: Art and Depression. I felt like art had saved me from depression. I wanted to write about the balance between the two.

When HealthiNation did my videos, they touched on my art a little but they actually cut 90% of my art out of the end product because they wanted just to talk about depression.

Although my migraines are very complicated, they’ve only been this bad (as in several ER visits a month) since the HealthiNation videos came out. I am so stressed.

This blog is mine, I own it, so I can turn things around.

I’ve toyed with the idea of making this blog “The Art of Living” instead of “The Art of Living With Depression.” It’s always been about more than depression. It’s been about living life with its ups and downs. It’s about survival and hope and endurance and even fun, sometimes.

My dedicated readers know the real story of this blog. Not all of the new readers understand. I don’t know what to do.

My biggest problem at the moment is that it really hurts my head to be on the computer. I could totally handle changing this blog, editing what information about me is on here, adding a merchandise shop so that people could support me beyond paypal donations or having to leave to visit my Etsy shop. Even introducing a few appropriate advertising spots would give me a bit of an income which would totally help my stress levels and perhaps my migraines. Yet I can’t look at this screen for more than ten minutes at a time. My head hurts too much.

This is why I’ve been so quiet. I miss you so much. I miss what this blog used to be. I want to save it. I want to change it. I want to grow with it and keep connected.

I am just so overwhelmed. So this is why I’ve been quiet.

I’m trying some new migraine treatments which are supposed to help me a lot soon. Maybe that will help me enough so that I can be on the computer longer and figure this mess out.

I miss you. I miss Daisies and Bruises.

I’m staying in touch the best I can. If I can’t continue to write as often as I would like to via computer, I’m going to try to pick up my zinester role a bit more so that we can continue this healing journey through writing that doesn’t make my head explode. Plain paper is much easier on my eyes.

Life is so unpredictable. Wouldn’t you agree?

Thank you for sticking with me. Here’s to hoping for improvement for all of us. Give yourself a hug for me.  I’ll keep you updated.

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ErinThe Art of Living With a Depression Blog

16 Comments on “The Art of Living With a Depression Blog”

  1. Susan Heney

    After reading your current situation and updated am feeling empathy for you. Can understand dealing w/migraines, and other health issues. Agree w/what you expressed. It is time to quiet any distraction from your own well-being. There are many places for people in mental distress to find help and support. This is not your responsibility! Would leave referral links for mental health/Depression on your site. Need to rest, then from a place of clarity, create what you want and need. Hope that you feel better soon. I read your blog before the Emmy award when it was small. Can see by my Facebook page that I limit who I friend so that I can enjoy and express what my interests are. Life is short so begin now to do what makes you feel that life is beautiful and a precious gift. Take care, Susan

  2. Laurent

    It’s ironic because I usually don’t leave comments and you’ll probably don’t read this one.

    The artistic SoUlution to this (taking multiple problems and solving all at once) is to launch your coaching business. Define your schedule, your price. This will filter out the weed, you’ll help the serious ones, you’ll get the money to take care of yourself and keep being an help to others. Just close your schedule when you are down. No need to fix anyone, most people don’t want to be fixed (and nobody can fix anyone probably because noone is broken). Just be there and relate, just keep offering your honest advice and perspective on life. This WILL be helpful.

    If this is unclear, contact me by email. Nothing to sell here. It’s just that you helped me when I was on my way down, I thought I could give you a hand on your way up :-)

  3. jen

    I’m sorry you have had this experience with readers. I wish you all the strength and hope something can be worked out that you continue to blog, maintain your own privacy and are able to put back your “hire me” link.

    all the best

  4. Rhonda Galley

    Hi Erin… I feel for you that the very exposure that could help has been a hinderance. I absolutely think you should rebrand, if you think that’s what you need to do. I was thinking about my own blog lately and how I started writing about my experience with depression, and I kind of feel like I’ve pigeonholed myself-think it’s a big part of why I haven’t posted in almost a year.

  5. Elizabeth

    I am such a huge fan of your blog, and I think this post is important for many reasons. One is the point that people with depression are more than just people with depression. Once people know that you have a mental illness (at least in my experience), all people see is the illness, instead of you as the person. Anyway, congratulations on the success, but I hope things become less overwhelming for you soon!

  6. Helen

    Hi Erin,
    I second everything Susan Heney says!
    You share a big part of your heart and soul with us. That’s a massive and magical thing to share with people.I know you love blogging and we love you blogging and all the other fab things you do. You will be loved and supported whatever you decide to do. Please do what is right for you and your health. Take time to work out what is right for you….and only you. The folks that love, respect and admire you will be behind you whatever you decide. Am I repeating myself? I think I am! I just wanted to you know! Protect your mind and heart. They are special.You would do it for the pugs. Do it for you! I’ll stop writing like a crazy chicca.
    Helen x

  7. J

    dear Erin, I am so sorry too that you have to deal with this…. Thank you so much for writing about it. I agree with Elizabeth above that it is a really important issue for anyone who has – or indeed has in the past had – a mental illness of any kind … but I hate to think that you have to carry an extra specially heavy version of this load too, on top of everything else. Erin, you have the strongest and deepest of hearts, you are resourceful, generous, creative, articulate, warm, kind and brave. I respect you so much. I’m not writing my thoughts on what I would do with these problems because I know you find your own ways that work for you. I had noticed you had changed those things on your site and I wondered why and feared you must be suffering. I am sorry, and I am grateful that you explain it here. I too miss being able to read back through the old comments that people sent in long ago. But life changes, right? As you said in another post. And it will get better, because usually challenges are stepping stones to better things…? But all ways round this is in hope and with prayer for you, one step and one breath at a time.

  8. Growing Positive

    Sorry to hear how the exposure on the blog has affected you. I definitely think if you want to change the outlook on your blog, then changing the title to “The Art of Living” sounds a lot more positive and is likely to make your blog more about life in general. Hope you’re doing well Erin

    Growing Positive

  9. Roma

    Hi Erin. Sorry to hear about the migraines still being around and being overwhelmed about the website. Maybe your sister can help you with the layout. She’s your sis so she’ll understand better. She’ll also be able to look at the computer for longer periods of time than you and that way you can do it together and you won’t have to look at the screen for too long at a time.

  10. Rachel

    I completely understand where you’re coming from. In my friend group I tend to be the one who people go to for help and advice. A lot of times my owns issues get pushed to the side because someone else needs my help. It can be stressful at times. Last week my school brought in a professional on stress management to speak to us and try to help us. I really enjoyed his thoughts and feel like it’ll really help.

  11. Jonathan

    Sorry to hear how having this blog effects you. If it helps any, your blog helps me and seems to help others as well, but obviously, you need to take care of yourself first and foremost.

  12. John

    Keep going. Life was not to be easy for many. Depression is just one of many anomalies in a humans life. Life is good. Just got to find that good.

  13. Nemya

    Oh I’m so sorry that you’re in the place that you’re in. Like I’ve told others who have felt the pressures of bloglife take as much time as you need to figure it out. And whatever you choose to do your loyal readers will understand and support you. Sending many hugs your way… and I hope you get relief from your migraines soon ❤

  14. Carmen

    Hi Erin. I haven’t seen the video and I am truly sorry it is having a negative affect on you physically and emotionally. I am new to your blog, actually this is the second post I’ve read, I just want to say thank you. I found you by accident and I am so happy I did. Thank you for just being. Sometimes we just need to be alone even if it’s lonely with noise, it’s a Jerry Lewis reference from The Ladies Man. Again, thank you, reading the first post was unexpectedly cathartic and I feel like a jerk for saying that because writing is obviously your catharsis. When you’re ready, your readers will be here.

  15. Barbara Altman

    I can identify with the migraines. I’ve never had a painful migraine, but I do get silent migraines. They always start in the center of one eye and then spread out so the whole eye is affected. They are usally caused by stress.

  16. devi

    I am currently navigating living with a blog about my depression and understand some of your struggles. wishing you the best

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